It’s Time to Open Up

Dear friend who doesn’t open up,

I know you’re scared of getting hurt, I am too. You’re tired of people telling you to “talk about it” and “open up”, when you simply think it’s better not to. I understand what it’s like to lock away a part of yourself, into the depths of your heart, and to throw away the key into the depths of the ocean, never to be found. I know you don’t want to be found. I understand that it’s tough to present yourself in a way that no one ever gets too close. Never too close to hurt you. 

I know you think they’ll get to the deepest parts of your soul, and after knowing you whole, just leave. After all, it’s kind of funny how when we start to form bonds with people, we share ourselves with them. A part of ourselves resides with those people, and sometimes, they nurture our torn hearts back to life. So, when one of these people leaves, with words like “sorry” painted on their lips, we’re broken, once again. It’s terrifying, isn’t it? 

But, I want to tell you that it’s okay to open up. It’s okay to let down your guard around that one person who makes you feel as though you mean the world to them. You don’t have to hide anymore, it’s okay to let someone in. There is strength in your vulnerability; there is strength in opening yourself up to someone, into taking a risk for them. It’s not easy, but it’s worth the risk. All it takes is one person.

It does seem easier to always push people away when they get too close, or to always keep them at a distance. But, it’ll only make it tougher when you want to let someone in, someone who means the world to you, someone who you want to show yourself to, and you won’t be able to. To love means to be vulnerable– vulnerability is not a character flaw, it is simply human. So, take a chance, trust someone. Let your guard down, and let them in. Let yourself be the real you, unfiltered and unplugged. 

Sometimes, the people you open your wounds to, need to make their way out of your life. Slowly and simply, when they walk away, the part of you residing in them starts to shatter like brittle glass, and much like glass shards, leaves you bleeding. But, it’s better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all. After all, loving somebody and being able to be yourself with somebody is a rare and beautiful feeling. 

Sometimes, they will have to bid farewell to you, and that’s okay, circumstance is not always on our side. It won’t be easy, and it’s a wound that may never truly heal, but sometimes, just the memories keep you going. It will be tough, but you will learn to make peace with it. Everyone has their own way of coping, and you’ll find one that is true to you. It could be listening to music and crying your heart out, or scribbling on a piece of paper to rid yourself of the frustration. You will find your process, and you will get through it, one step at a time. 

It may stop you from trusting again, it will scare you, and perhaps, scar you. But, that’s when I want you to open this letter again, and remind yourself that it’s okay. It’s okay to feel this way. Amidst the chaos, we forget that life is neither a race nor a marathon, it’s a journey. It might take time, but embrace the journey– the journey to hope and healing. The scars won’t go away overnight, but we will learn to accept them. We’re all moving, and learning in this journey. Sometimes, we end up moving in different paths, simply because there are different obstacles meant for us to face. And, that’s okay, too. We will cope, and we will find our own unique process.

I know you’re fighting battles with yourself, and it’s not easy. But, you don’t have to fight them alone. Let your emotions flow through you, after all, we’re all human. It’s okay to feel, you will heal. Whatever you do, just don’t look back. There is a light in you that someone is waiting for, that someone desperately needs. So, don’t lose hope. Keep going, and share your light with the world. Don’t let what happened in the past dim that light. Keep on pushing back the dark, little by little.

Written by Nandinii